[00:00:00] Heather McAbee: Move from this space where you've been victimized and you've been hurt by people, and you can move into this space. Let's get clear on your next direction, on your next life. Let's meet yourself again.

[00:00:17] Rebecca: Hey, you. Thanks for tuning in. Just a quick heads up, this episode is rated PG 13, so expect to hear some mild language or adult concepts.

[00:00:38] Shawn: Hello, radiant, Rebecca.

[00:00:39] Rebecca: Hey, Shawn. How's it going?

[00:00:41] Shawn: I'm doing great. Today I have a question for you. I have a story and then a question that I want to ask. Okay, we've talked about before and you know that I grew up with an abusive dad and the story that I wanted to talk about today was just real quickly when I was about 15.

[00:00:59] I think a lot of young boys kind of go through this spot where they start flexing their muscles a little bit, especially with their dad, where they try to take on a little bit more of a masculine role and try to figure out who they are in their life. And there was a time. My dad and I were in an argument to some kind.

[00:01:14] I don't remember what it was, but I remember we were at the breakfast table and I said some flippant remark and he like fired right up, grabbed me by the shirt, lifted me up and slammed me against the wall and was threatening to hit me. And I remember just being. The dude was like 2 25, 2 40 , and I was probably 150 pounds at the time.

[00:01:36] And, and I just remember being terrified and frustrated and humiliated that all of this was happening, right, because I was just doing what, you know, well, I, I didn't know it at the time, but having a, a raised the boy myself, I know that it's a normal process. I was just doing what all boys do, but I got this violent attack and that affected me through a good part of my life.

[00:01:57] The reason I'm telling that story is [00:02:00] because, There is, I found somebody who was able to take that story and take away the emotional charge from it. So now I remember that the thing happened or remember that, that I got slammed up against the wall, but I don't feel that sense of shame and that sense of anger and that sense of frustration anymore.

[00:02:17] And so that person, what I'm wondering, the question is, do you wanna meet that?

[00:02:21] Rebecca: Oh my gosh. I think I have already met this person. You gave too much away in your story. I know who it is. . This must be Heather McAbee, who you turned me on two years ago and I have been working with for three years, four hours.

[00:02:35] I don't, I can't remember. Heather, do

[00:02:38] Heather McAbee: you remember? Hi, everyone. Love that intro. You know, Rebecca, I would say it's three. It's at least four. Yeah, it was when I lived in Washington.

[00:02:51] Rebecca: Wow. Yeah. It has been a good four years. It has. It's been lovely. Yeah. So, Sean, you brought Heather on the show. Tell me why, what's up?

[00:03:03] Shawn: Well, the first and foremost reason is Heather is one of my most favorite people in the world. The second reason is because that's not the only thing that she has been able to help me kind of get past on an emotional level. There's been, I've worked with Heather for years as well, and there has been countless things that I don't even actually remember that we've worked on because my world has changed.

[00:03:24] My life has changed so much because of the work that we've done. So the work that we, that Heather does. Heather, you want to tell us about the work that why don't you, why don't you? It'll be better hearing it from you. Why don't you tell us about the work you do.

[00:03:36] Heather McAbee: I think the short story, well, okay. I assist people in erasing the beliefs that keep them from love, connection, and belonging.

[00:03:47] So when I say erase, that's why what you said is, I don't even remember these things because my life has changed so much. Because we rewired your brain, we rewired your nervous system so [00:04:00] that those past events of hurt are no longer affecting you today. And you

[00:04:06] Rebecca: know, I gotta say, I have been around for those four years and watched you as you've been going through this process, and it's been interesting.

[00:04:13] I don't think I knew the whole time that you were getting your brain all cleaned up and spiffy and ready. But I did know that this is my friend Sean, who's always doing something really powerful. He's learning to take time for himself. He's stepping into community and leadership in powerful ways. He's wanting to fulfill his dream of having a band.

[00:04:33] So yeah, fuck yeah. He's doing it. I don't know. It, it's been really fun to be your friend and to be in your life and to watch this. And now maybe I know what was spurring some of those big, deep changes in you.

[00:04:46] Shawn: Hey, the powerful person behind the powerful person.

[00:04:49] Rebecca: Oh, right, . Oh, wow. I like powerful people. So yeah, you do.

[00:04:54] Let's, let's, yeah, so tell me more, Sean, what is the key youth here that makes it so powerful and so quick to make changes while working with Heather? I like

[00:05:06] Shawn: to think things sometimes from a, uh, of a spiritual person, but I like to think of things as well from like a scientific. Um, aspect as well. And when I think about the work that Heather does, there's two things that come to mind.

[00:05:18] Number one, like with music, for example, if somebody in the room is playing a bass guitar and they, and they hit a string, and it, that sound is on the same vibration as my guitar. That particular string on my guitar will ring out as well. Same thing if you play a, a, a note and maybe some music loud in the, in the house, and you have a glass sitting on the table.

[00:05:39] If that, if that same vibration reaches the glass, has the same vibration as the, as the music that you're playing, the, the glass itself will vibrate. So that resonance then is, makes both things vibrate at the same time. One of the other exploration self-development programs that I, that I've done before talked about, they called it the [00:06:00] realm of now versus the realm of meaning.

[00:06:02] So for me, the realm of now was my dad threw me up against a wall when I was trying to stand up for myself a little bit, threatened to hurt me violence. That sort of reaction to it. The meaning that I attached to that when I was 15 years old is I shouldn't stand up for myself cuz there's bad consequences.

[00:06:19] I'm not a very strong person because look, this person overpowers. Things like that. So the, the realm of now the realm of meaning is what we are, what our brain attaches to the event. What I love about Heather's work and what I've experienced with her is that she can detach that meaning from the event.

[00:06:36] So the event still happens, but now I no longer resonate with because that happened to me. That doesn't mean that I'm not powerful. That doesn't mean that I have to stay quiet. That doesn't mean that I can't stand up for myself, et cetera. And I think that that, that's what I love the most about Heather's work is that by detaching ourselves from that meaning by no longer resonating with that meaning, we're now free to operate in the way that we're supposed to operate inside.

[00:07:00] Rebecca: Yeah. And, and now you resonate with a more accurate and truthful meaning of like, someone took advantage of a, a boy, right? That's not okay. And absolutely that's the reality of the situation. Not I'm un unhelpful or I shouldn't stand up for

[00:07:17] Shawn: myself. And from there I can flip to the spiritual side where I can now resonate.

[00:07:22] How do I, you know, how do I want to operate as a man in this world? How do I want to bring myself out to the world? How do I wanna interact with other people and with other events that happen? I loved

[00:07:33] Heather McAbee: your description. I also like to bring in how powerful our brains are, because that event for you happened at 15 and you were still resonating with those pieces of, of.

[00:07:50] That you attached to yourself rather than to your dad, because that it really was his shame that you were carrying for him. So with [00:08:00] the word, we can rewrite that story. It doesn't mean the story didn't happen, the event happened. He threw you up against a wall. But yes, that meaning behind it, the feelings that you were still attaching to it, that you were carrying forward, that actually belonged to him.

[00:08:17] You've now put back in the right location, he can have those and you can live your life as the man that you wanna live and the father
[00:08:24] that
[00:08:25] Shawn: you wanna be. That opens up the door to another part of the work that you do, Heather, that I think is so important of releasing generational patterns, releasing patterns that we've learned as a child, maybe even before we were born, or just that people have been handing down for generation after generation in our family line.

[00:08:42] Can you talk more about.

[00:08:44] Heather McAbee: I would love to because that is my main mission to end generational trauma patterns. We've even found now through science, through epigenetics that traumas are passed down through our D n A to our children, and so the cells are storing those events and our children are born with these pieces of them that are already hardwired for bad things happen.

[00:09:09] And so with this work, we're able to to change the frequency of the cells so that they are no longer carrying the traumas. The statistics show right now that four out of seven children are experiencing abuse events like you talked about, or. More neglect, sexual lack of food. There's, there's all kinds of ways that you can define abuse.

[00:09:37] So if the statistics are four out of seven, that's a giant number of people. The statistics are also saying that 30% of people who have been abused are continuing to abuse their children or somebody else that's a large, large. And I think it's extremely important right now [00:10:00] for everyone to be looking about how do we change these generational trauma patterns?

[00:10:05] How do we put an end? How do we draw a line in the sand that says it stops with me and it's not going forward from here? I think that's

[00:10:12] Shawn: a fascinating aspect of this as well, because my, my, I have two children of course, that you know, and, uh, young adult children now, and they did not experience the physical and emotional abuse that I experienced as a.

[00:10:25] However, I know that there was mistakes that I made and there's certainly some things that they'll probably have to come to you and work on themselves as well. And I also, because like what you're talking about there, I also understand that there's things that my dad did to me and that my grandpa did to my dad and so on that are still affecting both of those kids as well until it gets cleared up either through me, through them, but somehow through this work that.

[00:10:49] That
[00:10:49] Heather McAbee: is correct. There are, so there's yes. If you think of, if you think of life energy, if you wanna be somewhat spiritual, if you think of life energy, like a waterfall flowing, think about the biggest waterfall that you can think about and just imagine the very top of it is your oldest, oldest ancestor.

[00:11:13] As that water continues to flow, you have all these people in your lineage, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and it, the water all the way down to the bottom gets to you. If it's flowing beautifully and there's nothing constricting it, you have all of this water, you have all of this energy cuz that's what the water is representing as your life energy.

[00:11:34] When you start bringing in the traumas your dad experienced, the traumas his dad experienced, those are like log jams or debris that's getting put into the water that's flowing on that waterfall. If you go back 20 generations, I know some of your sessions Sean's, there's been things that have come back 16 Generat.

[00:11:57] Think about 16 generations back, [00:12:00] how many people that is, how many logs are in that waterfall? There's barely a trickle left of water for you. And if you don't have all the water that you need, you don't have energy for your children, you don't have energy for your work, your life energy is literally drying up.

[00:12:17] So our, our work right now is to remove those log jams so that you have the energy and the water starts flowing.

[00:12:27] Rebecca: That's a really interesting analogy. I don't think I've ever heard of it like that as a waterfall flowing from your ancestors down to you. I, I don't know how much it feels accurate for me to base my life choices on, but it does feel interesting, at least in a mythological perspective.

[00:12:45] Anthropologically
[00:12:46] Heather McAbee: speaking, it provides a nice visual. Yeah, everyone knows what a waterfall looks like and what it looks like when you jam up water.

[00:12:55] Shawn: I think there's also some systemic evidence of, of it. I mean, if you, you know, most people are not very motivated. Most people are, don't have a whole lot of energy for anything except for the necessities.

[00:13:05] I think there's definitely an argument that can be made that we can, we can feel in the world right now, the evidence of this, that waterfall being jammed up over generations and generations.

[00:13:16] Heather McAbee: Yes. And when th this, this is a huge topic and we could talk about it for nine more podcasts. There's also other things that have to be brought in when you're thinking about generational trauma patterns, because like for you, Sean, with with your dad not behaving properly as a man and as a father figure, then sometimes those roles can get reversed.

[00:13:42] And so if you become the man of the household and he's acting more like an adolescent, Like he threw the fit at the breakfast table. You were just trying to stand up for yourself. So when the roles start to get reversed, now think about the waterfall with the ancestors, [00:14:00] and now you're on top of your dad.

[00:14:01] There's literally nothing for you and you're completely blocked from receiving anything from your father because you have to get your life energy from your parents. This, like I said, this is a really big subject, but that's just kind of a tiny little tip of the ice.

[00:14:16] Shawn: That would be a fun extra podcast that maybe we could do.

[00:14:19] And I think, I mean, you know, just based on what I know, I know that that you're right, that this is a, that's a huge subject. However, that does kind of lead into something else that Rebecca and I were talking about would be a fun thing to discuss with regard to your work. Rebecca, you mentioned a book that some of the people are in your life are reading and some of your experiences with some of the men in your life.

[00:14:36] Rebecca: Yeah, so the book is called No More Mr. Nice Guy, and it's got a fairly provocative TI title, but as I'm reading it because it's, it's been so interested to so many people as I'm reading it, I'm seeing that, I think it's actually. Really about shame and anybody who has shame in their past can use this. I know I have a lot of the things that he's talking about to get past this or, well, he calls it to stop being Mr.

[00:15:07] Nice guy into become an integrated man. But process, he encourages to do that is to find safe people that you can be open and vulnerable with and slowly. Grow into a more responsible human. And to me it feels exactly like what I've gone through a lot of it with the Abraham Hicks community, but I think you, you both probably have other communities that have been your safe spaces where you could be vulnerable and expand and grow your responsibility and, and I'm curious about that.

[00:15:40] This, this book talks about it specifically in regards to men. And men that have been raised by women, but not really socialized to be healthy men by other men. And anyway, I just thought that was fascinating to me right now. And [00:16:00] speaking of generational patterns, that definitely sounds like one,

[00:16:03] Shawn: if you could see what was happening.

[00:16:05] Right now, I'm raising my hand enthusiastically. When Rebecca was talking about being raised by women and without a healthy male perspective, . In fact, Heather, we've done quite a bit of work on that. And you were with regard to like Mr. Nice guy, like I think that I'm a pretty nice guy. However, the nice guy that I think that we were talking about that are referring to in that book is the guy that is manipulative and allows himself to be manipulated.

[00:16:29] And I can certainly say with emphasis that the work that I've done with Heather has stopped meet me from, from being that kind of Mr. Nice guy and still being somebody that is kind, compassionate and, and you know, protective and caring, but not somebody that will allow himself to be manipul. Heather, we did a session on this just 30 days ago, and to be honest with you, I know the shift that I have made in the last 30 days, but I don't remember a whole lot about what we talked about and about the session.

[00:16:57] Can you help me help, maybe help the audience kind of, we can go through, we have my permission to go through all that private material like you. I'll tell you, I'll tell you this, Rebecca, about Heather. You said that she works with you. I don't know when she works with you. I didn't know that you were working like this is all information that has come from you.

[00:17:13] Heather has been meticulous about the privacy of the people that she works with that may have some sort of connection to each other, and I really appreciate that. I can trust her. I can trust her absolutely implicitly with the information that. That I give her and that she's not gonna, she, she won't even, she'll, not only will she not tell somebody about what we talked about, she won't even tell them that we work together.

[00:17:37] So Heather has some incredible integrity. Integrity with that. So

[00:17:41] Rebecca: that's my . Then I get to share all of my dirty laundry with you directly.

[00:17:46] Shawn: Exactly. Which is so much more intriguing. So this is my long way of saying, Heather, you have my permission to talk about that session specifically and kind of help the audience understand what happened.

[00:17:58] Heather McAbee: My, my favorite [00:18:00] example of not sharing, being meticulous, I was working with a couple and I saw him and then I saw her and they were back to back and living in the same home. And I was getting off the Zoom call with him and I said, okay, I have to go. I'm getting ready for another client and. He left and she came on and later that day, the two of them talked and they were like, oh my gosh, you're the client that she had to get off for
[00:18:32] That's my favorite story with that one.

[00:18:34] Rebecca: That's very fun. I feel like I could do you a little bit. Do you guys wanna hear? Sure. I was on a date with a lover in public. And there was someone else there that was wanting to on a date with me a couple days later, which was really exciting.

[00:18:50] Heather McAbee: That's pretty fun.

[00:18:51] Yes. We have to be very careful when we're dealing with people's lives. So your session, Sean, it was literally on January 19th, almost exactly 30 days ago. Good memory. You came to me and you said, I wanna increase my masculinity, so my feminine partner trusts me. That was the gist of what we wanted to accomplish today.

[00:19:16] Okay. Okay. So statements that came up for you, because when, when we're in session, I muscle testing your unconscious mind to see what the limiting patterns are that are keeping you in this problem space. And so when we pulled out what the unconscious were, It was, I have lots of trouble with women. And you're like, well, yeah, that's why I'm here.

[00:19:41] But then the things that came was, nothing's ever good enough for them. I'm useless. And then there was also my professional life. When my professional life is successful, my private life is a disaster. There was always this yin and yang for you of never stability of the two pieces of your life. [00:20:00] Women are stronger and more powerful than.

[00:20:03] That was one of the statements, so that's a really different big difference in the polarity. We had to recharge the polarity of you being on the masculine pole and then these women you were dating, being on that feminine pole. Some things came in of feelings of being resentful and angry, and then it would manifest into my life feels empty and.
[00:20:26] We had to rewire all of those. Pull 'em out, let 'em go. Here they are. Now we can look at 'em and see, well, this is the problem that's been keeping me in these problem relationships, and now I'm ready for something new. So the things that we brought in where I'm nurtured by differences between myself and women, there are lots of ways of pleasing women.

[00:20:47] I'm valuable to them. My partner treats me with love. And then there was this masculine piece of, I like taking action to secure what's needed. I'm willing to be the strong one and take care of my role. Those were the most of the statements that we let go and the statements that we brought in. And then you had a little bit of homework that day and you had to go do an exercise at that taking action to make sure that you really recharge that masculine pole so that you were attracting the types of women that you wanted to attract in your life.

[00:21:21] Shawn: I do remember that one of the exercises that we did, modalities is what you call them, one of the modalities that we did to help release those and re-pattern the way that my brain was working on that was I did grow up, you know, when I was 17 is when dad left and like I said, you know, he was abusive up until then, well through then, but I was 17 when they, when they split out, I took on the masculine role inside the family for sure.

[00:21:45] I took on the father role and the husband. And one of the things that we, we worked on, in, in the modality that we worked on was that I had to actually imagine permission from the powerful females in my family to be a man and to be [00:22:00] masculine. So there was a couple of my aunts that were there. My mom was certainly there, my grandma was there, and I had to imagine them saying, yes, it's.

[00:22:09] We want you to be the masculine man. We want you to take on the masculine role. That was a very interesting thing, and I tell you it's had profound effect in those last 30 days. I have noticed a shift in the way that I deal with my clients, like I'm far more direct, still incorporating the kindness that I, that I appreciate about myself, but I'm far more direct and I don't let people walk all over me and I don't let people, you know, I don't do things that I'm not comfortable with or that I don't want to do.

[00:22:37] For example, I was just out on a lunch date with somebody and she suggested that we watch a movie together, and it was a movie that I have absolutely no interest in because I find the subject matter important, . And in the past I probably would've been like, you know, just to kind of please have been like, yeah, okay, well we can do that.
[00:22:54] You know, like I'll self-sacrifice and I'll do something that I don't want to do in order to try to maintain or at least gain a relationship with this female. As soon as she said, I was like, no, you'd be hard pressed to ever get me to watch that movie, and here's why . And then I looked back at that about an hour later.

[00:23:12] I was like, wow, that was something that wouldn't have happened, . That was something that wouldn't have happened prior to that session. It's fascinating. Like I say, often I don't remember what we work on, but when I look at what's going on in my present life, I can say that's the effect of the work that I did.

[00:23:25] Heather McAbee: Absolutely. And that's how quickly it works. You were on that date two weeks later, maybe. This. When you bring in that permission from the ancestors, when you saw all of your aunts and your mom and all of these women in your family, these ancestors who actually brought these patterns in through your DNA and through the things that you saw and experienced as you were growing up.

[00:23:50] This is one of those things you were talking about, Rebecca, of like, where do you go for this community? Of people to support you. Well, our biggest [00:24:00] support in life is our ancestors, and if you can get their permission to grow and to heal and to learn and to prosper, whew. It is giant. I, my half my dad's side of the family is Native American, and when I do visualizations with ancestral healing, I don't know who it is, but there is a big.

[00:24:24] Who is standing at the top of the waterfall probably. But he is always there. He's got the headdress, he's got the full feathers, he's got the whole, and it's always a shadow, but he's there and he's got something in his hand and he's just like, do it like to everyone down the line. And it is, it's so powerful and amazing.

[00:24:47] It makes me, I'm always like, oh, there he is. When I start visualizing. And it's,

[00:24:52] Shawn: it's very, very, Wow. Wow. Yeah, and just to be clear, like my aunts were not abusive. My mom was not abusive. These weren't women that had also mistreated me that I suddenly needed permission with, but there was something energetically that either was passed down to me or that I just decided when I was young that I needed that needed to be cleared up.

[00:25:11] That was, it was fascinating. I love the big chief. You told me about that before. That is so cool. . It's like, it's so

[00:25:17] Heather McAbee: fun. When I see him , I'm like, we're getting some something done right now. Here he is.

[00:25:23] Shawn: And are you able to use that when, when you need strength? Like is that something you can like call upon?

[00:25:28] So
[00:25:29] Heather McAbee: yes, that I have brought that in just within the last few weeks myself, because I've been doing these, these talks, live conversations about healing trauma and I was getting really nervous. I was telling my stories and it just, there was a lot of things that were happening inside my body. And so now when I walk into situations like that, I visualize him behind me and he is, Boom, let's go.

[00:25:59] [00:26:00] Let's do this. It's time to end
[00:26:01] Shawn: it. Yeah. Wow. So we've talked about, well, my own personal effect here, and then the tying into what Rebecca's experience with some men in her life are like. Like this whole world of like a masculine versus not masculine, versus this whole world of masculine and feminine polarity.

[00:26:17] And you've talked about trauma and how you like to help people with trauma. Let's, I wanna, well first of all, like what kinds of trauma can we, are we talking about, is it just something very severe? Is it sexual, physical? Is there other types of things that people can deal with inside this work?

[00:26:35] Heather McAbee: There's a lot of things that people can deal with inside this work.

[00:26:38] My main focus is people that have experienced some sort of sexual trauma is usually what comes up for my clients. I have a program. I'm calling it clear, C L E A R r. It's a six step program year long to move from this space where you've been victimized and you've been hurt by people. And you can move into this space.

[00:27:07] Let's get clear on your next direction, on your next life. Let's meet yourself again because we lose our creativity, our joy, our love, our zest for life when we've experienced these things in the past. So the, the steps are i'll, I'll just say what clear stands for it's creativity. It's not necessarily in this order.

[00:27:29] Creativity, love is gonna be your self. Empowerment. So now let's get out of these places where we keep repeating these patterns of people hurting us awareness. That's self again as well, relationships. So now we're gonna start to look at how is this affecting your partnerships? How is it affecting your friendships?

[00:27:49] How is it affecting your business relationships? And then the final aspect is retreat the second R in clear. And we move through the full year [00:28:00] doing this one-on-one work. And then it culminates in this week long group retreat where we have this, you wanna talk about community is these people coming together for this immersive experience where everyone is on the same path of trying to better themselves and better them their lives and better their relationships.

[00:28:18] Rebecca: Talk about a group of safe people that sounds like heaven to. It
[00:28:23] Heather McAbee: absolutely is, and for me, from my aspect as I'm facilitating it, my absolute favorite part is I get to watch these people physically transform because I'm with them 24 hours, not 24. They're sleeping on their own. I'm with them 12 hours, seven days.

[00:28:43] And I watch this space in between their eyebrows, this space around their eyes. I watch their necks and their shoulders, everything just release and move into this loving space for themselves and relax relaxation as they're releasing all of these emotional weights and toxins throughout the week.

[00:29:04] Rebecca: Mm, that sounds lovely.

[00:29:06] Shawn: Heather had one of these retreats in September last year, and I was able to go to, And I can say firsthand that I think that my eyebrow had that little space between my eyebrows had to, you know, clear it up a little bit from the perma front and the people that we were there with or that I was there with the other people that Heather was working with.

[00:29:25] As astounding to, to the, the friendships that were created in seven days. The connection that was created in seven days, the things we talked about in seven days, and everybody was just in that, you know, we were talking earlier about a community, like it was an Heather has the ability to create a space and to hold a place for everybody to have.

[00:29:46] Immediate sense of community. I don't think it was a day Heather before people started opening up and talking and there was not like, don't get me wrong, this is not like people who are just like wanted to put on blast all of their problems. . There was at [00:30:00] least half the people. There were those that were just kind of like arms folded across the chest.

[00:30:06] Closed off and saying, well, I'll see what this is all about, . And so it was really amazing to watch and to feel that kind of energy and that kind of love and compassion inside the room with people. There was only one other person that I knew, everybody else there was a stranger to me. And, and it was, it was really a fun experience and it was in a paradise.

[00:30:28] Rebecca: That's always, well, what a bonus, right? Actually, I, I remember when you had that retreat, I was so excited to go and I just couldn't make it work in my calendar. So now that you're having one in April, I am signed up and I'm bringing some of my team. Woohoo. So, So, yeah, I can't wait to party and vacation with you guys and get my brain all scrubbed up again and yeah, and reconnect with myself.

[00:30:53] I love this and, and I love that it's not just for people with trauma, right? Because this is, trauma is important and it's useful to know how your body and your emotional state reacts to trauma so that you don't have to castrate yourself for these things that are perfectly natural for these reactions.

[00:31:13] Of course you're having, of course you're having a hard time sleeping. Of course this is hard. But as people start to be aware of that and to have more self-compassion, in my experience, the these processes of changing which patterns you're resonating with, what, what I'm, for me at least what I am still.

[00:31:34] Mentally, what models I'm mentally working from has been incredibly helpful in taking some bigger and bigger steps in my world. So pretty soon I expect to be having both of you over for a housewarming party from my new amazing place. Wouldn't that be fantastic? Yay. Talk about big steps.

[00:31:56] Heather McAbee: Yeah, it doesn't have to be for [00:32:00] trauma.

[00:32:00] If you have a way that you wanna uplevel your life, we can do it. There's usually always a reason that we can clean up of why things aren't going or flowing the way that you want them to flow.

[00:32:15] Shawn: That's why I think Clear is such a great acronym, Heather, you know? Okay. Any, any sort of area that you just want to be happy?

[00:32:21] Get clearer or have, well, actually it's clearer, even clearer cr yeah. C two Rs in there, you know, get clearer or, or find some focus inside. That can be, we can use your work to, to help with that. I think we're talking about two different things right now, right? We're talking about a retreat that you have in April, like the one that I wouldn't do in September.

[00:32:40] By the way, I, I don't think I know this because I'm actually going to the one with re in April as well. I'll be there too, Rebecca, so, so you've got a retreat in April. It's February, so two months from now, little, little more than two months we leave for Mexico again. Yes. And then you're also talking about this clear program, which is outside of this retreat coming up in April, but it would start as soon as somebody signs up and it would be a year long retreat or or a year long program that ends in another retreat next February.
[00:33:08] Correct.

[00:33:09] Heather McAbee: Yes. Right now is when I am accepting applications for that year long program because it is February and the next retreat is in February. So we're gonna have 36 one-on-one sessions. We need the year to take care of that at least three per month. And then we, and then we get that February retreat at the end where we have the full on immersive experience.

[00:33:33] So it is two different things that we're talking. There is one of these retreats coming up in April, so my intention is to offer that year long program two times per year and then have two retreats on different ends of the year, if that makes sense.

[00:33:49] Shawn: Awesome. So somebody could either work with you for 36 sessions over the, over the coming year and then go to a retreat, wherever that will be held, but probably in a paradise next [00:34:00] February.

[00:34:02] They can come to this retreat without ever having worked with you before. Is that correct? They can come to the one in April. That is

[00:34:08] Heather McAbee: correct. There are, right now there's two people signed up in April that I have never worked with and I have never met. And the last one in September, there was three that I had never worked with.

[00:34:20] So it's, it's a blend of past, present, and future clients. And you can start there or you can end there. We just, or you can continue there, put it that way. Well, I, for
[00:34:33] Rebecca: one, I'm very excited, especially right now in Seattle with the gray in the winter, Mexico is calling my name for sure.

[00:34:44] Heather McAbee: Montana is about 20 degrees, so February is the perfect time to get outta Montana and go to Paradise.

[00:34:52] They, all of the retreats will be in paradise.
[00:34:56] Shawn: So I was just thinking about the beginning of our discussion. We were talking about masculine, feminine polarity, and on the masculine side, Rebecca, you had spoken to before we started recording to some of the people in your life, the men in your life, you're seeing not being, not taking responsibility.

[00:35:11] Not taking responsibility for themselves, being in the victim mindset, that sort of thing. And when I think about the work that Heather does, And being somebody in a masculine role, and it's not just the masculine role, it's actually in a powerful person role. Anybody that wants to be a powerful person, masculine or feminine, actually has the responsibility to make sure that they're doing this kind of work with Heather.

[00:35:34] I think with Heather , I'm biased, but I think with Heather specifically, but I would say in general to make sure that they're doing this kind of work because we cannot let that waterfall of life energy continue to be damned up. We have. On a collective consciousness, start releasing those logs and start letting that that light force flow to, to ourselves and to the people that follow us to the generations follow us.

[00:35:59] I think there's a [00:36:00] responsibility that we all have to do this sort of thing.

[00:36:02] Rebecca: And I might add, if you're not quite ready to go on a retreat, but you still want to have some kind of. Epiphany with this material today. Find a group of safe people who can you be safe and vulnerable with, and start having conversations.

[00:36:17] Be curious, ask questions, listen and see what you come up with because that's a good, as good a place as any to start. Your growth
[00:36:25] Shawn: community is so, so important. So Heather, if they were ready to start doing this work with you, where would they find you?

[00:36:32] Heather McAbee: They can find me on the. At www dot shifting sans for health, it's the number four.

[00:36:41] Shifting sans for health.com is my main website. There's a link there for the retreat, consciously connected. There's also a link for my Meeting Yourself. Again, program. I have a bio on there and all kinds of information. , yes, there's, there's some blogs, .

[00:37:02] Shawn: I am really looking forward to seeing you, Heather, in April.

[00:37:05] Heather McAbee: I'm looking forward to seeing you and Rebecca,

[00:37:09] Rebecca: I'm looking forward to seeing both of you and the sunshine on the

[00:37:13] Heather McAbee: beach. Oh man.
[00:37:14] Shawn: On the beach. This place, it's a place called Gani. It's, what is it? X I N I? Yeah.

[00:37:19] Heather McAbee: It's like an S Hani.
[00:37:21] Shawn: Yeah, S hani. You fly into Porto Vallarta, you take a water taxi about 40 minutes across the bay and it is quiet.

[00:37:27] It is lush, beautiful beach. Oh my God. It's, it's an amazing place. It's, it, it, I would go there just on vacation, let alone get seven days of doing some in some amazing, you know, feel good type work. So, oh, and the food, oh my God, the food is all provided. I don't remember. I think there was one dessert that I didn't like, but other than that, I don't think there was anything, which is odd for me that I wouldn't like a dessert, but it was, it was like a avocado dessert that I was just like, it's.
[00:37:56] That was one of my favorite ones.

[00:38:00] Shawn: Yeah, it was really a great time and great environment, great food, great Everything.

[00:38:06] Heather McAbee: This resort is an eco-friendly location and it's set in this tiny town of 500 people. It's the perfect mix between jungle and ocean. Mm. The, the people that work there are family, they're almost all of them cousins.

[00:38:26] They make you feel like family. They know your name, they know your dietary restrictions. They are there to serve and it's just beautiful. Wow.
[00:38:36] Rebecca: Mm. Now I'm drooling .

[00:38:39] Heather McAbee: 60 more days. Woohoo. We have two left for the retreat in April, so if you're ready, it's time to sign up. Right.
[00:38:48] Shawn: Oh, there's only only two left.

[00:38:50] Correct.

[00:38:51] Rebecca: Excellent. So all right people. Okay, you too. Thank you so much for being on the show. It's such a pleasure to have you back. Anytime I get you, Sean and Heather, I'm glad we got to have you back for your second episode.

[00:39:05] Heather McAbee: Thank you. Wait, thank you so much, Rebecca. Yeah. Is there anything I can do for you as a thank you

[00:39:10] Rebecca: for this?

[00:39:10] Well, I'm already going to Paradise with you, so I don't know. I, I'm pretty blissed out as it is. Thank you.

[00:39:17] Heather McAbee: You're welcome. Thank you.

[00:39:18] Rebecca: Woohoo.

[00:39:20] Shawn: We'll see you next time.

[00:39:23] Rebecca: Hey there. Pleasure. Well, that's it for today's conversation here at Pleasure Central Radio. We love using conscious communication science, geeky and copious amounts of true pleasure to improve our partnerships, our money, and our love lives, and we hope you do too.
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[00:40:00] Follow me on your favorite podcast player, find out more, and get in touch@pleasurecentralradio.com. Your thought to ponder today is
[00:40:08] Shawn: because that happened to me. That doesn't mean that I'm not. That doesn't mean that I have to stay quiet. That doesn't mean that I can't stand up for myself, et cetera, by detaching ourselves from that meaning by no longer resonating with that meaning, we're now free to operate in the way that we're supposed to operate inside the world.